Felicia Chiao’s drawing: “The house is well built but the foundation is unstable” is such a brilliant metaphor for the role of attachment and personality in our psychological makeup. It’s the first 2 to 3 years of our lives that lay the foundation of our emotional lives for the rest of our lives. If were …
There are many reasons it’s difficult to leave an abusive relationship. Some of the reasons are of practical nature, fx. Financial or safety worries. Others are of a more psychological nature. One of them is the psychological phenomenon of trauma bonding. Trauma bonding forms in exploitive relationships. It’s best described as: “The sicker the relationship, …
The sicker the relationship, the stronger the bond – trauma bonding and what that means Read More »
This photo, originally from Janina Fisher, PhD, is one that I show quite often to my clients. The response is usually the same, a quiet moment followed by: “Wow…” Most people have never seen their pain and symptoms drawn up like this, haven’t made the connection between the symptoms they’re manifesting and their painful experiences …
Imprints of trauma are more varied than you realise Read More »
Try putting your finger horizontally over the middle, and see how the colours of the blocks change instantly. What before was very distinctively two colours, blend into the very same grey colour. What’s happening here? This is a great example of what is called “top down processing”. Every second of every day, your brain is …
How your brain cooperates with your mind to generate your individual reality Read More »
When you look at a forest, it looks as all the trees are individuals, standing there in the ground all alone. What you might not know, is that underneath the ground, they are all interconnected. Did you know that trees operate through an intricate system called the “wood wide web”, which consists of a symbiosis …
Meditation is for your brain what going out for a run is for your lungs. Here’s a body scan meditation that I recorded some time ago, that I would like to share. Body scan meditations are a good way to connect to your own body. One key aspect of trauma is the disconnection that often …
„Have you ever seen an old photo of yourself and been embarrassed at the way you looked? Did we actually dress like that? We did. And we had no idea how silly we looked. It’s the nature of fashion to be invisible, in the same way the movement of the earth is invisible to all of us …
Friendly reminder: Legality is not a guide to morality Read More »
What forgiveness is not: It’s not the same as forgetting what happened It’s not the same as agreeing with or liking what happened It’s not the same as absolution It’s not denial It does not mean we will never again get angry about what happened It’s not something we can decide to give once and …
Even though fictional books can be wonderful, and can change the lives and thought processes of their readers, I personally rarely give myself time to read fiction. The reason being that there are so many amazing non-fiction books out there, too many for one lifetime. The book I‘ve given most as a gift, recommended and …
They say time heals all wounds, but that is only half part true. In order for a wound to heal, the conditions for healing must be right. If you break your leg, but you need to continue walking on it, the wound will re-open again and again. Wounds need care, rest, shelter, time, space and …
Never underestimate the healing power of your own brain Read More »
